Wowza, where did April go? I swear, I just can’t keep up with how fast time flies by these days… April was an special-kind-of whirl wind for me, but a good one at that. I celebrated my birthday and spent lots of time handling school matters, learning to live with two new insta-roommates, and trying to keep everything together as much as possible. Yikes. Exhausted. But let’s talk letters now, shall we?
Have you ever written yourself a letter? I don’t mean your future self, or your past self, because I’ve seen those kind of letters-what I really mean is your current self. Have you sat down and written something to yourself as you are in the present? You should.
Why You Should Write Yourself Letters
You may be shaking your head at me and thinking it seems silly, but honestly-it can be so therapeutic and even quite cathartic. A lot of us do this often. We journal, or we blog, and we’re constantly putting our current thoughts and feelings down into writing and presenting them to our readers or tucking them away in a diary for safe keeping. If you’re already doing this-great! Keep up the good work! If you’re not doing it, or it’s not quite having the relief of personal touch you’re wishing it did, then it’s time to write yourself a letter.
Just hear me out-grab yourself a pen and some paper, and sit down by yourself somewhere quiet for a minute.
It’s almost a meditation. Take some deep breaths and drown out the sound of the world around you. Push anything that is stressing you out of your mind for a few moments. Those school assignments, that big work project due next week, that fight you had with your friend or loved one… Anything that’s putting pressure on you-just give yourself ten good minutes without it weighing you down-and sit and think and write.
Now put the pen to the paper and address it to yourself. Dear me... Dear [insert your own name or nickname]… Add a comma and drop down a few lines.
What do you need to hear right now? Write it down.
What do you wish someone else would say to you write now? Write it down.
What advice do you desperately need? Write it down.
The answers are inside of you, and you don’t need anyone else to console you or tell you what choice to make. All you need to do is listen to your intuition, to that inner voice inside of you that loves you and wants the best for you. Listen to that part of yourself that strives for nothing more than joy, order, and peace both inside and out. Tune out the part of your brain that is your harshest critic, that goes over the anxieties you are facing repeatedly, or that dwells in the negative. Those aren’t involved in this. If you listen closely to the right parts of yourself, they have all the words you need to hear, and those words will soothe you. Just write them down.
Write until you fill the paper or the words stop flowing. Write until the things you need to know are laid out before you in permanent ink. You can’t erase them. You can’t forget them. They are there and they come from you. Read them over and over and over again until they sink in, or until something changes. Fold your letter and put it away for when you have a bad day and need to be reminded of those things, or burn the letter when you’ve gotten everything you need from it. There’s such comfort in the ritual of it all, and sometimes we just need that finality. Repeat this process as often as you can and/or need to do so.
It can be powerfully healing and the best kind of therapy, if only you let it be.
A Letter to Myself
I know you are tired, and you feel like you’ve been continually stretched past your limit mentally, physically, and emotionally. Your finances are weighing down on you, all of the responsibilities you’ve taken on are overwhelming you, and it all just feels like it’s swelling up and getting ready to burst. I know you’re afraid of that bursting-but you need to let it out and stop trying to push it down and just keep trudging forward.
It’s okay to take a moment and allow yourself a small breakdown. Let all those stresses and worries out, then take a nice long nap, and you’ll feel better. Remember to drink your water, move your body, and allow yourself enough sleep. Neglecting yourself for so long has only made this all feel exponentially worse, and some rest and nourishment will have you feeling better before you know it. Do it. This weekend. Don’t delay any longer.
My April Sponsors and Their Letters
This month, I asked the fabulous bloggers who are advertising with me to take a moment and write themselves a letter. I like to introduce the month’s sponsors to you at the end of each month, but I want to do it in a creative and unique way-this fits in perfectly with that. It allows you to see a little bit of their vulnerability, and get to know them better-which is exactly what you should do because they’re all wonderful. I don’t approve ads for people I don’t think will be a good fit, and this group has been even more stellar than expected. They’re so great! You should also know that I didn’t tell them anything like I’ve written above about writing a letter. I simply asked them to write themselves a letter and let them do with it what they will-so these letters are wholly them.
Kimi from Kimi Who
You are so incredibly blessed. Sometimes, I wonder if you’ve forgotten how lucky you are right now…TWEET IT
Get to Know Kimi Better
Here are a few recent posts, chosen by me, that will help you get to know Kimi and her blog.
Follow Along with Kimi’s Life
Esther of Local Adventurer
Dear Esther in the present,
These next months are going to be challenging. You’re in a confined space with Jacob, and you will get pissed off a lot with him. You will get pissed off a lot not having reliable internet since your job relies heavily on it. Isn’t bad internet worse than having no internet? You’re sitting there wasting time hoping that something will go through. Don’t waste your time. Move on and work on something else. These challenges will most likely grow your relationship and you’ll probably learn a lot about patience. Yes, it’s important to be consistent on the blog, but it’s also important to live your life. There is no substitute for that. Don’t get so caught up in having to post 3x a week or an instagram every day. Just be grateful for the incredible adventures and be present.
Yes, it’s important to be consistent on the blog, but it’s also important to live your life…TWEET IT
Get to Know Esther Better
Here’s a few recent posts, chosen by me, that might help you get to know Esther better and what you’ll find at Local Adventurer.
- We’re Moving! Help Us Pick Our Next Grand Adventure!
- We’ve Moved Into an Airstream
- 25 Best Hikes in the World to Put on Your Bucket List
Follow Along with Esther’s Adventures
Andi of Misadventures with Andi
Remember, you are on sabbatical. That’s a BREAK from work. And I know you would really like to figure out how to replace your corporate salary with blog revenue, but you are also on vacation. So don’t stress if you take time to enjoy the trip you are on. You are very lucky to have the opportunity to take a year off from work. If you have to go back to work next year, so be it! You’ll deal with that later, for now, just ENJOY!
Get to Know Andi Better
Here are a few posts that Andi picked herself so you can get to know her and her blog better through them.
Follow Along with Andi’s and Her Misadventures
Hannah of The Perfect Storm
Hannah, you are amazing. Don’t ever doubt the talents that you have or what you can accomplish. Believe in your abilities as an artist and as a photographer. Don’t let anything hold you back and don’t be afraid to go out on a limb on new adventures. Do all of the work you can, and take advantage of the time that you have.
Get to Know Hannah (and her Partner Sara) Better
Sara had to skip writing a letter this month due to finals, but Hannah has chosen a few posts from their shared blog she thinks will help you get to know them better. Check these out!
- TPS Style on a Budget: Shoes Under $20
- Make the Purrfect Cat Treat Jars & Treats
- The Morning Brew with the BFFs #4
Follow Along with These Two BFFs
- The Perfect Storm: A Blog by Two BFFs on Facebook
- @perfectstormbff on Twitter
- @perfectstormbff on Instagram
Alexis from Chemistry Cachet
Always remember that slow & steady wins the race. Things may feel overwhelming right now or like you are stuck, but things always pass. You will look back on this time with sweet memories of getting to know yourself better and learning as you go. Take everything one step and one day at a time! Treasure your loved ones that you are helping right now because family is the most important thing at the end of the day! Remember to find joy in the little things because that is what you always love most 🙂
Get to Know Alexis Better
Here are a few posts that Alexis has chosen for you to read, that will help you get to know her and her blog better.
- Easy Make Your Own Vanilla Extract with Free Printable Labels!
- Soft Dairy-Free Fudgy Brownie Cookies
- Chemist Solutions: Is Decaf Even Good For You? Sharing ALL the Details!
Keep up with Alexis
Deynece of Deux Bella
Gosh I am proud of the last two years of my life, I faced a big time fear when my boyfriend and I decided to move away from Seattle, from a job that I changed my whole life for to follow my heart and move home to be with my family.
I sought out advise from many people in my life and I loved the wise words of A dear friend, mentor and colleague Kim Kapinos when she said to me, “When you make choices to make your inner self happy, everything else will follow.” And it sure did, I am now a Wife, co creator of an awesome blog and soon to be homeowner and happier then I have ever been.
Never listen to the people who try to tear down your positive thoughts. You know what is best for you and best for your family. You are a determined, motivated and an inspiring women. Never sell yourself short, you are brave, you are strong, you are driven, you are a great leader and teacher and you are on your right path. Keep doing what you do, follow your heart in all things you do, and make the choices that are the best for you and your family.
Great job!! XOXO *Me* Deynece Rypkema
Melissa of Deux Bella
Oh, Melissa. There is so much going on right now, and sometimes you worry you aren’t spending your energy doing the things “you should be”. Let me tell you a secret; there is no “should haves”. I’m going to tell you to write out your WHY and hang it up like you’ve meant too. Keep working and focusing and making progress. Baby steps are still steps in the right direction. Some days it may feel like it’s pointless but you are so close to achieving the WHY you started out with. That WHY is everything.
For months now, you’ve been wondering what to do. Your mind changes daily, even hourly. You go to bed with your mind made up, only to wake up again confused. You’ve got mommy guilt and wife guilt over wanting to have it all. You’ve got feminist guilt. You’ve got the guilt of not being in academia anymore or not using your degrees in a regular 9-5 capacity, but you also find more joy and fulfillment from your current path than you ever thought possible. It’s OKAY to be content with being a mother and a wife. Your feminist mind can shut up for once. Do what make YOU happy.
You know what you want to do, where you see things going, but you wonder if you deserve it. You wonder if you’re brave enough to say yes. Here’s what you need to know, what you, on some level, already know.
Everything you’ve ever wanted is out there, waiting for you. It is also right in front of you. Your WHY is possible. There’s independence. Self-acceptance. There’s the ability to give back, to get back to the humanitarian work you started years ago. To be the example to your children you want to be and teach them to worry more about others than about themselves. To feel fulfilled. To achieve the goals you have set physically, mentally, spiritually and in business. You have the capacity to do it. You have the capacity to do hard things!
Start a gratitude journal. It might sound funny and cliché, and while you are well aware of your blessings, having them in a physical place you can look at when things are hard will help you remain centered on the positive and not spiral as you often do. It’s okay to be happy about the good things. It wont jinx them. Be excited about your home being built instead of worrying about the what-ifs.
Get back to clean eating; you will feel better on every level. It’s not about some arbitrary weight loss goal, but it affects every aspect of your life, so just do it. It will also help quiet that always present fear of a relapse.
Make the gym a priority again. It gives you so much energy. That 35 minutes in the gym gives you hours of energy in the long run. Raise those endorphins girl!
It’s not a flaw that you need a clean space. It’s okay. Breathe deep and just recognize it needs to be a priority in your life.
There’s also a man who supports you in every capacity, who truly loves you. You see it in the way he looks at you, the way he watches you when he thinks you aren’t paying attention. The way he works so hard to make YOUR dreams come true and to keep a smile on your face. Make time with him a priority, make sure he feels the support and love from you that he gives so easily. Be patient with him as he is with you. Kiss him more. Every day!
Remember too that you are living your dreams everyday. This isn’t a race or destination. Take the time to appreciate the many joyful moments you have everyday. See that little boy who makes your world go round? That is joy and a blessing you never thought you would get.
Prioritize your day around your WHY. Everything is going to be alright in the end. Breathe deep, snuggle your babies, keep your house clean, make exercise mandatory, keep a gratitude journal, talk to God more, eat right, get enough sleep and make time with your husband a priority.
Get to Know Melissa & Deynece Better
Here are a few posts, picked especially by Deynece, that she feels will help you know them and their blog better.
Follow Along with the girls at Deux Bella
Vet of Miss Chocoholic
I started blogging in June 2014 and although the journey has been amazing so far, I experienced moments when I just wanted to give up blogging.
What would you do if another local blogger whom you know had actually plagiarized your hard work and blog post for the same event you guys attended? I know that there is nothing much one can do and there is no entity which you can “report” it to. Anyway, we were no longer friends after she realized that I found out and recently she “attacked” me on Social Media, which I did not even want to defend myself so as not to fall into the vicious cycle and her trap.
These are the painful moments that make me realize the ugly side of Social Media and how a small quarrel or misunderstanding can be amplified in Social Media with the parties pointing fingers and twisting facts. These are the moments that make me want to stop blogging and negate all the good things that I have done for my blog so far. On a happier and lighter note, I recently won the Best Wellness Award from Expressions (a spa and wellness brand in Singapore), along with a free staycation, complimentary spa cuisine and a trophy!
The lady boss of Expressions drop me a personal SMS recently to ask if I am keen to be her spa writer to review spas in Asia as she is compiling the list of Asia Top 100 Spas. Although I will not get paid as a spa writer (other than a free trip), I think these are great opportunities that would not have come my way had I not been a blogger. Hence, I keep telling myself not to give up and to keep on keeping on.
Get to Know Vet Better
Check out these posts, chosen by Vet herself, that will give you an idea of what you can find at Miss Chocoholic.
- 6 Confessions of a Blogger You Need to Know
- Being Unfollowed? 4 Reasons Why You Should Not Get Upset
- The New Instagram Algorithm: 5 Tips You Can Use to Stay Ahead
Follow Along with Vet
Thomas of Thomas Crawshaw
We’ve been through this before, you need to stop stressing over anything and everything! You always manage to figure things out and you know that in a few weeks you’re going to be feeling ten times better than you do now. Give yourself a bit more credit and fight for what you want – push yourself. University isn’t the be all and end all of your life, there’s so many more possibilities out there for you – don’t get yourself into a funk just because you’re unsure about whether you need to stay here or not. No one is going to be let down, and you aren’t letting yourself down. Do what’s best for you and do it in your way.
Think of all the good things in your life. Family, friends, boyfriend – you’re surrounded by such a good support system and everyone is here for you. You might feel lonely now but trust me you are far from it. Sort yourself out, set up meetings, go for a walk and relax. Set it all out in your head and clean things up. You can do this Thomas!
Get to Know Thomas Better
Here are a few posts that Thomas has shared with us so you can get to know him and his blog better.
Follow Along with Thomas
Natalie of Cosmos Mariners
I know that you feel as if you’re on one of those little hamster wheels right now—you’re running faster and faster and still not going anywhere. Lately, it seems as if everything needs more time and more energy from the blog and social media promotion to your travels to your toddler. And, worst of all, you have the same amount of time and energy that you’ve always had, which doesn’t work out when you always need to do one more thing. I’m here to tell you that it’s okay that things are a bit overwhelming right now. They’ve been this way before and you’ve come out on the other side stronger and even more well equipped to deal with whatever comes your way. After all, your toddler will only be this little once. Your blog will only have growing pains for a while. Say it with me: this will pass. This will pass, and you will feel so much more accomplished. You are awesome!
Get to Know Natalie Better
Here are three posts that Natalie chose to represent herself and her blog to you. I hope you love them!
- 10 Things You’ll Think After Becoming a Travel Blogger
- Why the Aran Islands Need to Be a Part of Your Ireland Trip
Follow Natalie and Her Travels
What would you write to yourself?
Please, by all means, leave it in the comment! I’d love to hear it!
A huge THANK YOU to all of my wonderful sponsors this month. They’re all so utterly fantastic that I just love promoting them and without them this blog wouldn’t run as well.
If you’d like to sponsor My So-Called Chaos in May, head on over and buy an ad spot now! I’d love to have you. 🙂 For more information on my stats and to read true testimonials from people who’ve sponsored me before, check out my Work With Me page at the top.
Oh and hey, if you read this whole post and want to sponsor me then please use code LETTERS for 30% off any ad or service for the month of May. You earned it, and I can’t wait to work with you!